Here are some of our inspiration boards from 2009. Do you have a favorite?

It’s All Greek to Me:

Goldfinger:

Something Old, New, Borrowed & Blue:

Think Pink:

The Wizard of Oz:

From Russia With Love:

Vintage Halloween:

Gothic:

Cornucopia:

For me , every December brings with it a very special reminder about the importance and sacred-ness of life.  So instead of making New Year’s Resolutions, I think of three things I’d like to have accomplished by the next year’s December. I then put these three goals up somewhere where I can see them daily. I find ways each month to move myself closer to my end-of-the-year goals. For example, one of my goals last year was to have my website up. Although it took me several months to learn website design, taking small steps each month made it tolerable, fun even.
I suggest you try this kind of goal-setting and see how well it works for you.

1. List 3 things you want to accomplish by next Christmas.
2. Find a way each month to move yourself one step closer to each of these goals.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Gabrielle Gujjari is a newlywed who successfully survived planning her wedding. She is also a certified professional life coach who specializes in relationships and women’s issues. You can visit her blog here.

A few weeks ago, over coffee Susan and I were discussing creative ideas for our blogs. “I’m thinking of doing a theme for the month of December,” she told me, “something from The Christmas Carol; like the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.”

Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” is one of my favorite stories. I kept thinking about how appropriate her theme was for this month in the coaching world. She inadvertently stated exactly what it is about the holidays that leaves so many of my clients feeling anxious and emotionally strung-out: the issues of the past, the uncertainty of the future and in the midst of this, the struggle to stay grounded in the present.

Where in your life do you play the role of Tiny Tim? Where in your life do you feel like Bob Cratchit? Where in your life may you be playing the part of Scrooge?

Answering these questions can lead to a profound revelation about the many roles each and every one of us play in life. Most of us like to think of people, and ourselves, in black and white terms. It’s interesting when you begin to realize that all of us encompass the innocence, pure heart and love of Tiny Tim; the humility and devotion of Bob and also the miserliness of Scrooge.

Identifying the multi-faceted aspects of ourselves helps us get clear on who it is we’d like to be and what it is we want to create. Identifying the multi-faceted aspects of others can lead to a more balanced and compassionate perspective. Try answering these questions honestly and see what happens.

This month, I’d also like you to face some of the Ghosts of your Past. I’d also like you to think of what you’d like your future to hold. But most importantly, I’ like you to remember that no matter what, the present is the place where we are now. Happy Holidays.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Gabrielle Gujjari is a newlywed who successfully survived planning her wedding. She is also a certified professional life coach who specializes in relationships and women’s issues. You can visit her blog here.

Today you will be visited by the Ghost of Christmas Past!

We all know Charles Dickens’ classic story of  “A Christmas Carol” and we are all familiar with the story of Ebenezer Scrooge and the spirit of Christmas. The holidays are a joyous time of year but also very hectic.  But they needn’t be  filled with stress that is related to family relationships.

When I started talking to people about what was the hardest thing about being around their families during the holidays, I got this answer; feeling like a child and resorting to the coping behaviors used as children.

Perhaps it’s the big brother’s snide comments about your job or your mother’s comment about your divorce that leaves you feeling small and vulnerable. Perhaps you find yourself trying hard to gain your father’s approval or not standing up  for yourself when your sister teases you. There’s something about being around people you grew up with that inspires forgetting all of the self-help advice and strategies you’ve got under your belt and resorting to crying, sulking and slamming doors.

The reason it’s so difficult to be our mature, wise and adult selves around our family is because of what I like to call, “The Ghost of Christmas Past.” In every family there’s a set of unwritten and unspoken rules about who gets to say and do what. These “rules” go way back; they were formed when we were children and are the reason many people feel so stressed out around the holidays.

Before you find yourself resorting to the behavior of a five-year old next time your Uncle George asks you why you aren’t married yet, try this activity before the next big family pow-wow. You can do this activity with as few or as many people as you like. Just remember, although the Ghost of Christmas Past may make a visit this holiday season, you can choose to NOT be spooked.

1. List the name of a family member/someone you have to see around the holidays who inspires anxiety. (ie: Uncle George)
2. Write, in bulleted list form, what it is that this person does, says, doesn’t do or doesn’t say, that inspires your anxiety. (ie: He asks me why I’m not yet married .)
3. What is the unspoken “rule” that is present in this situation? What is the assumption here? (ie: That I have to politely listen to his lecture on why I should get married).
4. This holiday season, write at least one specific and loving action you can take to “break” this rule. (ie: I can interrupt the lecture and say, “Uncle George I know you want me to be happy. Thank you for your concern. I’m going to get some egg nog.”
5. Now go and break the rule.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Gabrielle Gujjari is a newlywed who successfully survived planning her wedding. She is also a certified professional life coach who specializes in relationships and women’s issues. You can visit her blog here.

As many of you will recall, when Dorothy is transported into the Land of Oz, she is soon accompanied by three interesting characters-The Tin Man (who longs for a heart), The Scarecrow (who wants a brain) and The Cowardly Lion (who is pining for courage). You may also recall that these three characters travel with Dorothy because they believe that the Wizard of Oz will give them that which they believe they lack. On their journey, however, all three characters eventually realize that they already possess what is it that they believed only the wizard could give them.

Now you’re probably wondering what this all has to do with your upcoming wedding.

The story of Dorothy and her three companions illustrates some important points that brides-to-be may wish to consider. As a newlywed, I can tell you that the journey of planning your wedding can really seem like a trip into the Land of Oz and when you go, you will certainly want to take with you your three most important companions-your heart, your brain and your courage. The decisions you will need to make will require a balance of all three.

Your wedding is one of the most special days of your life and you will want it to be filled with people and things that you love. At the same time, it really is just one wonderful day out of many to come. It’s very easy to lose perspective on what this whole event is about when you’re constantly bombarded by the details. Choosing the font on your stationary or what to get your bridesmaids may start to become bigger headaches than they need to be. Your wedding is a celebration of love. If you put love at the center of all of your decisions, the daunting process of planning a wedding becomes much easier.

It’s also important to use that lovely brain you have and to choose wisely. Make and stick to a wedding budget, even if your parents are footing the bill. You may want to make a list of important things that you are willing to splurge on (my husband and I decided that we wanted a lot of flowers and so made room in our budget for this).  Use your good sense and don’t overspend on things you don’t really care about.

Have the courage to make your wedding your own. Don’t listen to all of the “rules” about what you should and should not have, what you should and should not do. I almost had an anxiety attack when I was addressing our wedding invitations-there are so many etiquette rules and I abbreviated some things that “should” be fully written out. At the end of the day, I realized what really mattered was that everyone we loved was there to see us make our lifelong commitment, not whether I wrote “ln” instead of “lane”.

Finally, surround yourself with great and supportive people, because even the most even-tempered of women can find themselves frazzled by this event. You’ll want to be around people who empathize with you, who make you laugh and who inspire peace of mind. Finally, if the stress of the wedding starts to really get to you, you may want to hire a life coach to help your sort out how to handle difficult situations. No matter the situation, there is always a way to compassionately and appropriately handle anything. A life coach can help you figure out how to do just this so that your wedding day is all about love and not about drama.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Gabrielle Gujjari is a newlywed who successfully survived planning her wedding. She is also a certified professional life coach who specializes in relationships and women’s issues. You can visit her blog here.

Next week’s theme will shake it up a bit. That’s right, it will be shaken…not stirred…

I’d really like to think up a clever theme for next week. If I only had a brain…

Quoting my favorite character from the movie (the lovable Scarecrow) we bring you a theme week based on the Wonderful Wizard of Oz. The movie has been around for 70 years now and of course the books by L. Frank Baum date back even farther. Travel with us this week as we follow the yellow brick road (ruby slippers not required).

photo of ruby slippers: Christian Louboutin via Neiman Marcus

Whether you are the classic and demure blushing bride or a tiara-wearing rockstar, 2009 offers a beautiful colour palette to suit you!

There are two major trends that I am so very in love with that will compliment yesterday’s hair inspirations perfectly.

The first is the MATTE RED LIP…

On the fall runway:

And here at True Blind Faith:

To create the perfect matte red lip, line and fill in your lips with your favorite red lipliner.  Top with matching matte lip colour.  Another great trick is to moisturize lips, blot off excess, then use the red lip pencil only to completely fill in lips.  Voila- glamourous red lips that last all day!

Second trend is BEAUTIFUL PLUM…

On Rachel McAdams:

And my interpretation:

I love love love creating a soft and smoky eye using rich plum tones!  It’s an unexpected departure from the more traditional greys, blacks and browns, and brings life to just about all complexions.  Pair plum eye shades with soft pink or peachy lips and cheeks, or even just some bronzer and gloss for that natural glow.

Photo credits: Jeff Kreiger (second photo), glamour.com (first & third), Jennifer Jones (last two)